How to Find Out if a Cheating Partner Has Changed

After being cheated on, the initial feeling is usually one of, ‘it’s over’. But, once emotions have cooled down, an important question lingers: do you continue with the person the just hurt your or do you just call it quits and move on? Some relationships will need more than just a cheating incident to be broken apart, and you may decide in favour of keeping your partner in your life. One thing on which your decision will hinge is whether or not they have changed. They may say they have, but how do you know your cheating partner has made a complete U-turn?

Here are 5 signs your partner has changed from being a cheater.

 

1. Undoubted Honesty

 

The first thing you will notice if your partner has truly repented from their cheating ways is complete honesty about the affair. Full guilt acceptance is key, and they should not let any fall on you. They will tell you everything you wish to know about the incident without hiding anything. Even though hearing these details might be painful, that’s the starting point of the healing process. Your partner should not keep any details from you fearing you will pull the plug. They should be strong enough to let you know everything and allow you to decide whether to continue or part ways.

 

2. An Apparent Change in Their Lifestyle

 

A partner that has truly changed will make plans to save your relationship and implement them. They will be able to pinpoint exactly what made them stray and make efforts to work with you on it. You should see some obvious changes in them including moves to regain your trust like closer communication, wishing to spend more time with you, and coming clear in everything they are doing.

You will see huge shifts in their lifestyle like their choice of friends, where they choose to hang out, and when. If necessary, they may change such areas of their lives as work or place of worship, especially if these had anything to do with their affair.

3. Letting you know About Things You Never Knew About

When something as big as an affair happens and your partner regrets their actions, they will come out with honesty. But, the truth usually extends to other areas of their lives and they will tell you things that they never let you know before. This might be the time you learn about any incident you at first never had any idea about. It can be upsetting and you may feel even more betrayed. But, the fact that they are letting you know should be a sign that they value you and the relationship, and are willing to make changes to make it work.

4. They Give Your Relationship a Future

Although a cheating incident can be devastating, it can help your relationship take a new decisive direction if you can come out of it together. Usually, an affair either kills a relationship, sometimes slowly, or makes it grow dramatically due to all the honesty and attempts to make amends by the offending partner.

Your partner may have changed if they clearly make references to a future with you and take actual steps towards fulfilling that. For example, if the one thing you wanted to do is raise a certain amount of money before getting married, you may see them work more towards that goal.

5. They make you feel you are the only one more

A repentant cheater will show you that you are the only one, not just with words but with deliberate deeds. There will be more gestures with such a message, like flowers and other gifts, dinners at good restaurants now and then, and basically more quality time with you. All these will work to make your relationship stronger.

6. They Sever All Connections With the Person They Cheated With

If they have changed, they will sever all links to the person they cheated with. This should be the next important thing after confessing and coming out in honesty about their affair. Any communication, whether secretly or openly, is a huge deep red flag. If they value the relationship more than this person, they will cut all contacts with them. This might mean blocking the person on social media, blacklisting their phone number and email addresses, or even changing workplaces if possible.

7. They Allow You to Express Your Feelings

Your partner must give you time to rebuild your trust. If they value your relationship and see you as the only one for them, they will show more patience with you and be willing to wait for you to recover. At no point should they be upset with you for taking too long to fully trust them. After all, the trust should come from deep within you and shouldn’t be an act.