“I had been at it for 4 months without getting any reasonable results. Neither did I see any signs of success ahead. I broke up with my girlfriend after she cheated – twice. I thought I could try the internet to find someone but online dating just didn’t seem to work for me,” says Jason, 29, from Redcliffe Brisbane. He called it quits when he found himself on a date that went wrong the moment he saw the woman.
“I almost gave up the day I ran into what I think is my worst dating nightmare ever. She was just not the one, and that in every sense. She used an old photo and looked totally different, and she was going on and on about horoscopes and astrology. I am just not into that stuff. I tried to change the subject but somehow, it would creep right back into our conversation.”
“Once the date was over after what seemed like an aeon, she just couldn’t get that it was an awful experience that killed any chances for any more dates. She bugged me for the next two weeks trying to meet me again.”
So easy, yet so hard
Although online dating is quite accessible, it may not be as easy as a,b,c. It is not uncommon for you to find yourself in some sort of nightmare just like Jason. There are many ways this can happen. Sometimes you spend ages on a site without finding any potential mates, and sometimes getting responses from those you try your luck on can be hard.
Sometimes, you find yourself in Jason’s shoes: You find someone, like their picture, you get to see them and realise they look nothing like the photos suggested. At times you end up on a date with a complete jerk. But how do you change this and get to get results from your efforts?
After his worst dating encounter, Jason took a break and had to ask himself what he was doing wrong.
“I knew online dating works. I knew some people had gone on to tie the knot after meeting their love on a dating site. The fact that it was not working for me meant there was something I was doing wrong.”
Finding Free Dating Australia
For starters, he knew he needed a good dating site but the idea instantly brought thoughts of huge premiums for a decent site. But that was before he found Free Dating Australia. He reluctantly set up a profile and browsed the member section. To his surprise, he found people within his suburb.
“I was sceptical at first. Some of the free sites I had tried where a spam fest, oceans of fake profiles. But I was wrong about this one. I actually found people on the site from my own suburb, Everton Park. There were quite a number of them and after messaging a few, I got some responses. Nice!”
Jason also found the site to be incredibly easy to use and to him, that meant a lot of people might be on board. He says the navigation “didn’t take any triangulation skills” and the design was easy on the eyes.
Getting things right: a concise bio and great profile picture
But even a good dating site wouldn’t be effective if you do not know what you are doing. Jason knew after reading around the blog that he had to set up a solid profile if he wanted results. The importance of a well-written bio cannot be underplayed. It is such a big part of the process that some people go as far as hiring professionals to do it for them.
“After a few attempts, I came up with a really nice short bio. I asked a friend of mine to go through it and after a few corrections, we had something that could work.”
A good bio condenses some of the most important parts of your personality – the things you love – and also clearly points out the things you would like in a potential partner.
Equally important is a good picture. It has to be current, not something from years ago. You want people to see what you look like today. Clear quality and a friendly smile can go a long way.
“At one point, I used an older picture of myself. It’s not like I wanted to cheat or anything like that, I just didn’t know how important it was to use a current photo. I could tell that my date was disappointed when she saw me. I looked quite different. I knew not to use an old photo again. I thought of using a professional photographer but there was no need for that. My smartphone’s camera and a friend where enough for the job.”
Act as soon as you have to
There’s activity on Free Dating Australia, with people messaging and get responses. But if you want results, you have to be active and keep things going, moving through the stages as soon as it is appropriate. Once your profile is up, browse or search for suitable members and send a few messages. When you get a response, don’t wait to communicate back. Likewise do not spend forever just chatting back and forth. Set up a date as soon as it seems right.
Jason made the mistake of taking too long at first and things seemed to cool down along the way until all communication just stopped. It is only after he made efforts to get things going from stage to stage that he finally got to get his sweetheart.
“I don’t know why exactly but at first I spent so much time just texting instead of moving things forward to setting a date as soon as I could. I realised I was doing something wrong when I kept doing lots of communicating without anything materialsing.”
Don’t give up easily
Although Jason finally got what he had wanted in quite a short time after switching to Free Dating Australia, he was ready to be patient before he saw results.
“I have a friend who also joined the site after he saw my success. He was not as lucky as I was. It took him some time but he eventually found someone. Sometimes, things don’t happen so fast. You should always be ready to wait and keep at it even as you are doing everything right.”
Online dating works, and more and more people like Jason are beginning to recognise that. There are three kinds of people: Those that think online dating does not work, those that think it will rain romance the moment they throw a poorly done profile onto the web, and those that know it is possible but with the right approach.
“I find it amazing that right after my worst ordeal and just when I was about to give up on the whole online dating thing, I happened upon a great site that led me to a great woman,” Jason reminisces with a slight smile on his face. “Her name is Emily and we have been together for a year now. And no, she is not into astrology.”